I’ve dealt with depression for as far back in my life as I can remember; it has always had an effect of some kind on how I view the world. I have learned a wide array of coping skills and tricks to keep living and thriving through it, but a lot of times, it does make life a bit harder. However, the most important thing it has taught me is the concept of joy. Since I started seeing this particular trial as an opportunity to depend more on my faith and on God instead of an insurmountable obstacle preventing me from moving forward, my ability to experience His pure joy has exponentially increased. In the quiet moments - in the long nights where my heart seems held down by a relentless weight, when I’m cycling between tears and blank stares - those moments are when I have most strongly felt the bubbling of inexplicable, Godly joy arise within me. A fire that consumes my weak and weary soul with the knowledge that even in the depths of the pain, I can rely on the company of a Father who I can be sure will never leave. He never sleeps, even when the rest of the world does.
I find joy in knowing that I can ask for strength at 3 a.m., and He will lift me up with His mighty hands and relieve the weight tugging on my heart.
I find joy in knowing that this is His way of answering my prayers for humility, by allowing a situation where my human weakness overtakes me and I lift my eyes and heart to the only One who can truly provide me with the courage and ability to push through, and allowing me to get to the point where I know for sure that my own strength is not, and will never be, enough.
I find joy in knowing that He became wholly and completely human, subjecting Himself to the full range of emotions that we experience, so that He could remind us that He has been where we are and so is able to comfort us with unmatched levels of empathy and love.
I find joy in knowing that in a similar way, this trial allows me to more closely empathize with others in the same situation and share what I have learned about surviving it.
Depression is hard and painful and so, so real, but it brings with it innumerable opportunities to experience the joy of being one of His beloved children, and so for all of my days, I will sing praises to my Lord for allowing me to go through it, because I know His plan is perfect.
I find joy in knowing that I can ask for strength at 3 a.m., and He will lift me up with His mighty hands and relieve the weight tugging on my heart.
I find joy in knowing that this is His way of answering my prayers for humility, by allowing a situation where my human weakness overtakes me and I lift my eyes and heart to the only One who can truly provide me with the courage and ability to push through, and allowing me to get to the point where I know for sure that my own strength is not, and will never be, enough.
I find joy in knowing that He became wholly and completely human, subjecting Himself to the full range of emotions that we experience, so that He could remind us that He has been where we are and so is able to comfort us with unmatched levels of empathy and love.
I find joy in knowing that in a similar way, this trial allows me to more closely empathize with others in the same situation and share what I have learned about surviving it.
Depression is hard and painful and so, so real, but it brings with it innumerable opportunities to experience the joy of being one of His beloved children, and so for all of my days, I will sing praises to my Lord for allowing me to go through it, because I know His plan is perfect.